Scene #1
James BondCat: I'm not in the habit of giving answers to ... DOPES.
Mr. Big: You damn lucky Bondcat you even got an ear left to hear the question with!
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: Fire the truth gun Bondcat
Felix Leiter: What in the world?
State Trooper: Let me have a word with Mr Big. Bondcat is a loose cannon.
James BondCat: BANG .... BANG BANG BANG! (run like chickens, you fowl humans)
Scene#2
Cab driver: You know where you're going?
James BondCat: Hollydale, Downtown Hollydale
Cab driver: WHAT? You must have a death wish, man!
James BondCat: Well you just stay on the tail of that jukebox and there's an extra two hundred in it for you.
Cab driver: Hey man, for two hundred bucks I'd take you to an Arkansas cookout!
Scene#3
Tee-Hee: There are two ways to disable the evil syndicate, you know.
James BondCat: I don't suppose you'd care to tell me what they are?
Tee-Hee: One way is to take a pencil and write them a mean note.
James BondCat: And the other way?
Tee-Hee: Oh, the other way is twice as simple. You just stick your hand in there mouths and pull teeth out. Heh, heh.
THE FINAL ALTERCATION
Kananga: DCR, on the first wrong answer from Miss Solitaire, you will snip the little finger of Mr. BondCat's right hand. Starting with the second wrong answer, you will proceed to the more ... VITAL ... areas.
Mr. Big: Is THIS the stupid mother who tailed you to Hollydale?
James BondCat: There seems to be some mistake. My name is Speedcat ...
Mr. Big: Names is for tombstones! Y'all take this Cat out and WASTE HIM!
Tee-Hee: Mr. BondCat, good luck with that
M: [jumps out from the shadows] Here BONDCAT .... catch !!!!
James BondCat: By pulling out this button, it turns the watch into a hyper-intensified magnetic field. Powerful enough to even deflect the path of a bullet - even at short range, or so "Q " claims...
M: I feel very tempted to test that theory right now!
James Bond: [deflects bullets and beats everyone to a pulp]
EPILOGUE
Solitaire Lady: Is there time before we leave, for Love Lesson number 3?
James BondCat: [undressing] Of course. There's no sense going out with my gun half-cocked.
Solitaire Lady: Such a delicate touch.
James Bond: Sheer magnetism, darling.
[Bondcat unzips Solitaire Lady's dress with the magnet in his watch]
Solitaire Lady: I know who you are, what you are, and why you've come.
James BondCat: Ohhh just send me a postcard ... I'll get it from Miss Moneypenny .
James BondCat: I'm not in the habit of giving answers to ... DOPES.
Mr. Big: You damn lucky Bondcat you even got an ear left to hear the question with!
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: Fire the truth gun Bondcat
Felix Leiter: What in the world?
State Trooper: Let me have a word with Mr Big. Bondcat is a loose cannon.
James BondCat: BANG .... BANG BANG BANG! (run like chickens, you fowl humans)
Scene#2
Cab driver: You know where you're going?
James BondCat: Hollydale, Downtown Hollydale
Cab driver: WHAT? You must have a death wish, man!
James BondCat: Well you just stay on the tail of that jukebox and there's an extra two hundred in it for you.
Cab driver: Hey man, for two hundred bucks I'd take you to an Arkansas cookout!
Scene#3
Tee-Hee: There are two ways to disable the evil syndicate, you know.
James BondCat: I don't suppose you'd care to tell me what they are?
Tee-Hee: One way is to take a pencil and write them a mean note.
James BondCat: And the other way?
Tee-Hee: Oh, the other way is twice as simple. You just stick your hand in there mouths and pull teeth out. Heh, heh.
THE FINAL ALTERCATION
Kananga: DCR, on the first wrong answer from Miss Solitaire, you will snip the little finger of Mr. BondCat's right hand. Starting with the second wrong answer, you will proceed to the more ... VITAL ... areas.
Mr. Big: Is THIS the stupid mother who tailed you to Hollydale?
James BondCat: There seems to be some mistake. My name is Speedcat ...
Mr. Big: Names is for tombstones! Y'all take this Cat out and WASTE HIM!
Tee-Hee: Mr. BondCat, good luck with that
M: [jumps out from the shadows] Here BONDCAT .... catch !!!!
James BondCat: By pulling out this button, it turns the watch into a hyper-intensified magnetic field. Powerful enough to even deflect the path of a bullet - even at short range, or so "Q " claims...
M: I feel very tempted to test that theory right now!
James Bond: [deflects bullets and beats everyone to a pulp]
EPILOGUE
Solitaire Lady: Is there time before we leave, for Love Lesson number 3?
James BondCat: [undressing] Of course. There's no sense going out with my gun half-cocked.
Solitaire Lady: Such a delicate touch.
James Bond: Sheer magnetism, darling.
[Bondcat unzips Solitaire Lady's dress with the magnet in his watch]
Solitaire Lady: I know who you are, what you are, and why you've come.
James BondCat: Ohhh just send me a postcard ... I'll get it from Miss Moneypenny .
23 comments:
Get this man an Oscar!!
I want your gun! ;-)
Oh the drama...oh the horror...please protect the cat...
Where can one acquire a truth gun?
Arkansas cookout. hahahaha
I'm sure James Speedy Bondcat will be OK. Cats always land on their feet. :D
I know you will be fine. Such intrigue, such adventure, such danger and then there is the sex too.
Have a terrific day Speedy Bondcat. Big hug. :)
A perfect role for you Eric!
Did James Bondcat Rise to the occasion? ;)
Debbie Dolphin is still working on her nightmares in dealing with the Blog hosting company... there is a lot of work in transferring files, etc.
What an exciting story. Going off half-cocked! Bwaahahahahahaha
good one Sport! I added you to the Blog Roll of Honor. now to get to the otherd I've been meaning to add.If I can remember who they are.
What about Love Lesson #1 & 2? Did I miss out on those?
Oh yes....'tis ME! :)
Where ARE you?!?!? ;)
At first, I was excited to be part of a story, but then you beat me to a pulp!?
Why, I oughtta blow up your blog or something!!!
;-)
You got me laughing out loud! The photos are great too. You handsome spy you!
LOL@DCR Beaten to a pulp?
What of these love lessons? I need a refresher course.
You are too funny. Thanks for making laugh, because when I look at the dealing s in Washington DC right now, I could just cry.
Thanks Speedcat. You're the best!
you know, i totally never noticed the earrings before. wow! i also didn't know he could balance such a large coin on his finger. that is amazing!
Hello to everyone except the latin and Russian girls.
Busy today ... C U later :-)
maunie LOL protect the cat! ha ha ha ha ha!!!
... Speedy, baby? Hello to everyone BUT the Russians and wives?
That is SO unlike you. But it's probably because they were ... at your house already. .. ?
OK. No clue.
You goof ball.
You're on a roll "Big Daddy."
Hey Bondcat dude, I hear Ms. M. likes it up the jackses!
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