After building my Spaceship VENTURE Hollidalian, I planned my trip.
The mission would take 120 days, but I brought my laptop to blog about the journey ... time flew by. I never have encountered a mechanism that can twist time like writing. Hours seem as minutes, even in the vast darkness of the universe.
I also had my trusty co-pilot Mardy, an Apple Headed Chihuahua to break the intense loneliness of the tin foil craft. They call it tin foil - but why? It is really "aluminum". Of course with a high tinsel strength and low weight, this metal was the perfect material for my vessel.
![]() |
| From SPEEDCAT HOLLYDALE PAGE |



After a flawless landing, I grabbed my duffel bag and headed for the hotel. Yes, the rates were steep, but how often to you fly through 1 billion miles of black void in a tin foil space box?
When I arrived at the front desk a woman with purple boobs and green antenna's said, "What planet are you coming from sir?" .... what planet? How many planets were booking in to this place??
I replied, "Well, Earth of course ... are those naturally purple?"
She gave me the key to room 77, and never did answer the color quandary. Aliens are so sensitive!
Well, after such a long journey, I was parched. A grapefruit juice with a splash of diet coke on ice sounded terrific. Instead of going to my
room first, I stopped at the Inter galaxy Saloon and Dinner Club. Man, what a rowdy bunch in there! We were all talking shop, and comparing notes on bio-fuel mandates from the Utopian Commission on Uranus. (I put that in special for commenters)
The only other human in the place was the waitress .... and then she walked in. The most beautiful woman I had seen in my entire life. I invited her to sit at my table, and she obliged. We laughed, talked, and danced for hours! After a few more grapefruits, I got my nerve up and asked to to come up for a nightcap in my luxury suite. She asked if it was the one with the hot tub, and I said, "YOU BETCHA". Even though this verbal outburst clearly gave me away as a Minnesotan, she did not seem to mind.
After turning the key and opening the door to room 777, I stripped down to my bathing trunks and hopped right in. She sat on the edge, drinking some champagne.
Maybe it was the new planet, maybe it was the lighting ... who knows, but I asked her to marry me.
. . ... and where is my dog?? 


79 comments:
My first thought was that you were gonna die in that tin foil box. What were you thinking? Was that built to code? Of course, you survived being in a cantina with Star Jones, so you're clearly made of sturdy stuff. Minnesota is known for it's sturdy stock.
Yes ... the stock is hearty! One of the only ones with any value left.
My tin foil space craft is now on display at the Smithsonian. Scientists the world over are trying to figure out why I am still alive!
I thought you were going to make it with an alien. Drat I wanted to know more about the strange colors of body parts too.
You are a silly man Speedy. Don't delete me Speedy. Bwahahahahahaaha.
Have a terrific day. Big hug. :)
That WAS the greatest adventure EVER!
You were definitely tripping there. Hahahaha. Cool ride, though. And what did happen to your dog?
Meleah ... with 120 days to write this post, I thought it might be a good one. Usually I spend 3 minutes or so!
Mystery person ... trippin dog, TRIPPIN!!!!!!!
My dog? I think Mardy is still on Venus
Sandee ...I KNOW!!!!!
I guess some thinks are just not in my Holla Deck of Cards
DELETE DELETE !!!!!!!!!!! (he heee)
Cool story! Wanna X-change links?
Gosh....a few grapefruit sodies & you're a PUSHOVER!
Olga ... that's why I drink it at home now. After 77 marriages, I'm DONE!!!!
Busy Bear ... oh sure (he hee)
77? WoW....and I thought I was bad!
I mean good.
AH HA! LOL I was waiting for the planet of Moon Women! LOL ...
I bet NASA engineers are soooo jealous of that fine craft! LOL
Depends who you ask I guess!
Olga ... You married other undergarments?????
I hooked up with a couple of stinky old boxers before....in my OLD life....yes.
MUSE ... there are women on the moon too?!!??
I am planning another trip :-)
(this time a porche space ship)
Olga ... I was in boxing!
Reallllllllly? I bet you were a real knock-out Speedy! :)
I'm really worried about Mardy! You THINK he's on Venus? Wouldn't that be MARS since he's a boy? Oh wait! He's with all the FEMALE chihuahuas on Venus. I get it now. :)
Chris .... WHAT ?????????
Ha haaaaa!!!!!
You must be reading non fiction.
Olga ... they called me the Termination Cat
Oh, am I not making sense today? Must be all these Tim Tams. I'm fairly certain they have a VERY high sugar content. :) Tastes better than fiber. :)
WOW ! The greatest Adventure ever !!
"You bet eh !"
Laughing...Yes, where is the dog?
I just finished watching the movie "Fargo" (Smile) "YOU BETCHA"
Personally, I thought the whole universe loved Minnesotans...where was she from?
Hugs~
Annie
Annie ... she was from Xentropmania in the outer Zanadu!
She had an accent just like Olivia Newton Johnson
Mardy found his way back on a commuter train, and I have been feeding him Kennelration Masters Choice trying to make it up to him.
Chris ..... PLEASE send some of those over, won't cha???
Jaffer ... I think I will stay on the ground for a while, so if you want to borrow my foil rocket, be my guest!!
I highly recommend going to the Venus Hilton.
I wondered who bought Mir off of eBay. Now I know.
Looks like you fixed it up a little.
Um.... Speedy... I'm not sure I can share these things! Ya know how delicious BROWNIES are? Well, these just might (MIGHT, mind you) be one step better. I'm still pondering on it... I do enjoy brownies. And chocolate sheet cake. And...
Obviously, I need to eat dinner. :) QUICK!
I don't get it?
You flew to the moon encased in aluminum and asked Star Jones if her boobs were purple at the Star Wars Cantina?
Why don't you get more sleep and turn off the Sci Fi channel at night?
I heard George Lucas was looking for you... he's a bit touchy about his content or so I have heard.
Okay, that's pretty cute, but where's the 4x4 meme???
=) Bella
I'm stunned. I have no idea what to say to you. Purple???
Auntie
Speedy I want to go on the next trip...I will be bringing healthy snacks...chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream..pizza...lots of pizza. lobster salad...cold soda..
bacon eggs and blood pudding...had that as a kid and ya don't find that kind of good stuff anymore.
take me please..please
Your dog has been admitted to the Psych Ward at Hollydale General Hospital....& we have an extra bed available, if you're interested.
;)
LOL! A pure gem.
Hey speedcat,! why didn't you invite me along?!? :-P
*BIBI*
Will the Tin Foil Spaceship protect U from the White House "Fore" Four years? ;)
Should have asked the desk receptionist with the purple boobs out. I've been there. Turns out HE's really hot on his planet.(Smile)
Jaycee
"tinsel" strength had me just about dying with laughter. Good one, Speedy and a fun story. I love all the pictures, of course! :)
Awesome awesome awesome!!!!!
Perhaps a new prescription from Dr. Shoals is in order? When you come back to earth, bring me a woman with purple boobs, that sounds exciting:)
Bobby .. I knew you would say that, she is waiting here for you to pick her up in a tin foil car.
Thanks LOBO!! .. it is all true, except for the part with my dog.
Teeni, without pictures ... I would have to quit blogging !!
(my favorite part of a post)
Mista Jaycee Purple she he?? Whaaaaa ???????
Moneypenny ... it will if I live on Venus
BIBI!!! ... you can come with next time. I am building a 5 passenger foil craft now from ravioli tins
Nurse ... a bed sounds REALLY good right now. Can you call me in sick too??? (smile)
Maunie ... you had me at "cake"
Lets GO!!!
Auntie you are NOT stunned after reading post 588 and 907. This one was very rational in comparison!
Hi Bella!!
Memes and tags and awards go on Memetagaward blogs.
http://speedcathollydale2.blogspot.com
If I posted everything I do on this blog, there would be 8 posts a day ... to many!!!
Thanks for stopping by :-)
Michelle ... Hi sunshine!! I think you liked my voyage :-)
Chris ... if you really cared
Chris ... OK PLEASE send Tim Tams!!!!!!!!
ha haaaaa
Dmarks - THANK YOU, I was hoping someone would notice the fine craftsmanship I put into building (cloning) the parts to my ship!
Okay. I give up. I'll share. Look on the table in your new skyway. :) But I have to tell you, THIS HURTS!
I married a guy who drove a 1977 ORANGE Cadillac (no, he's not a pimp). A tin foil box doesn't look so bad.
Speedy you are so adventurous. How could she turn down your marriage proposal just because of the type of vehicle you drive? So shallow. Glad you made it back safely.
You are such a crafty man. I could never make anything out of tin foil.
Oh no! Mardy is lost in space?! Remember that show? HA HA!
"Danger, Will Robinson."
I think you are better off without the woman who is prejudiced against tin foil boxes. She probably had purple boobs, too, anyway.
Funny funny stuff here, as always, Speedy. Thanks so much for the laughs this morning. :D
checking in from a Best Buy store ... using a huge wide screen monitor.
WOW!!!!!! / have to go back to work in a few minutes - between jobs.
Hello from Speedcat :-)
Hello, I'm back for more. What a great adventure!
Reading it while at work on Friday evening (UK) and feeling all sorry for myself.
You've made my weekend.
Thanks
EW
Ps. What brand of tin foil was it?
I never know where to start when I am here.
How have you been?
Your a riot as usual.
Thank you DS !!
Debo ... foiled out!!!
EW... what a nice comment, and the brand???
Renalds Space Wrap
Daisy ... yah, I was being a little "ahead of myself" there anyway. She had leapard skin too!!
Summer ... if you start with small projects, like foil birds, it just is a natural progression!
McKay ... THAT's what I thought too! She also claimed I had a nose hair problem. (untrue)
MOMO - orange Cadillac? NO WONDER you married him!
I would love to have one, as my "car" is a 76 Pinto super hatch
MOMO - orange Cadillac? NO WONDER you married him!
I would love to have one, as my "car" is a 76 Pinto super hatch
Chris .........
I am loooking and looooooking
Did you take them Tim Tams back ???
Foiled in the end!
Next time take me with you!
FROM FACEBOOK
....... Jesse Wolff likes this.
Jesse Wolff
This is the comment I tried unsuccessfully to leave on your blog: I visited your link Speedy, the Venus VENTURE Hollidalian??? Haaaaaaaaa...Speedy, where does your mind dwell, my friend, where does it dwell??? you are a crazy,crazy,crazy Genius/Total crazy-crazy guy and I am laughing fit to burst!! The term 'ROFLMAO' doesn't come CLOSE to explaining the hysterical convulsions I was thrown into while reading your story.
Seriously though,as a report,your tale has its merits. Its extremely well written,and it shows that you not only have an excellent knowledge of the Galaxy, you also have a knack of being able to make really useful objects out tin foil.
... Read More... Read More
Sad to say,you didnt get the Lady Alien, but you should have learnt by now that Women all through the Galaxy really don't like getting married to guys with crap cars Or crap Spaceships or crap ANYTHING. It really sucks that you forgot that simple but extremely important Rule.
Still, Its an extremely riveting adventure,and kept me glued to my screen following your thrilling journey among the Stars ... incidentally, while I was idly perusing that picture of you relaxing in the Inter Galaxy Saloon,I realized that the glowing headed Alien to your rear is actually my 5th cousin Oikelmenni Saxxa Pooni, who has been missing from home for decades!!
I conveyed this knowledge to his mother, my Aunt Gannamiln of the Leather Heads, and she wants him to come home immediately ,seeing that the idiot ran off 39 years ago without bothering to make up his bed ! Plus, he needs his allergy meds. Please tell him that his Mummykins wants him to return ASAP, or face extremely dire consequences... :)
By the way, Speedy, you are and will always remain the unsurpassed Genius of 'Comedy and Craziness' :)) Laughter is great, its the Best Medicine
about an hour ago
Speedcat Hollydale
What a super comment. (((( big big smile ))))
thx Jesse
Post a Comment