Sunday, December 14, 2008

More Hollydale Neighbors and Working Stiff Outlaws


Reese witherspoon is now single , so make sure and eat lobster at her restaurant and smile a lot ... Reese Wither Spoons Is the lobster queen. Talk about wanting to dip something in butter and devour! She has a new restaurant on the corner of Hollydale Street and Main called "Creative Crustaceans". I eat there once a week and then run out before paying the tab.


Kevin Spacey in a space suite and an orange pant suit Kevin "Rocket Boy" Spacey is the only Hollydale resident to find his way out, and joined the space program. NASA to the layman .... He says Hollydale looks like a Twinkies from outer space.


Kevin Bacon make great Canadian Back bacon and ham. Kevin Bacon Kevin Bacon (that's for the googlr bots) he hee! Kevin Bacon's owns the local butcher shop, and make the greatest back bacon this side of the Canadian border. The Canadians are not good at much, but they really do bacon right.


Ellen Barkin barking at dogs and rhinos Ellen Barkin is a breeder an a magician! What a great combo ... she once mated a Chihuahua with a Rhino, and won the Pulitzer Prize in Genetic Engineering. Later that year, she admitted it was all an illusion. She now walks the streets of Hollydale with a tarnished badge of shame. I still dig the woman though.


Dane Cook ... who the F*** is that anyway? Do your own story here please ! Make up your own story for this one. I don't feel like it.


I like Chickens!


Billy Crystal Blows chunks of glass and sucks Billy Ray Crystal makes the best hand made ornaments in the world, but will not sell them. He claims there are no humans worthy of such fine art. When Billy get angry, he breaks all of his crystal into the fireplace, and lights fires downtown. Nobody likes him except Meg Ryan. She's a drunk.


Carrie Fisher Nuts is always talking to her Crappir pole. I love Carrie Fisher .... unsalted Carrie Fisher hangs around by the river and talks to her crappie pole all day long. She whispers "I am the princess .... I am the princess" to it. I am oddly drawn to that!


Sigourney Weaver is hypnotized by Bill Murry Sigourney "the weaver" Yarns not only has the weirdest name ever, she is also hypnotized by Bill Murry. She makes blankets and eats marshmallows.


Speedcat Hollydale (that's me) just opened a new cat boarding house. The facility is equipped to easily contain over 200 felines and two dogs - if under 60 pounds. PETA broke in one night and set all of the guests free, and the pack of crazed kittens destroyed everything in their path. Police reports show that all but one cat was rounded up "cowboy style" by Mr. Hollydale using a golf cart and a walleye net.
Estimate for first year revenues at Old Town Cat House Inc. are in the 7 figure range, yet Speedy has not paid any income tax. Government officials are planning to quarantine his Blogger account. Danny Hermanskins of the IRS was quoted to say, "That crazed cat bastard will come running in here so F***** fast!"

PhotobucketPhotobucketWalking Cat GIF

40 comments:

Lauren said...

OOOO YEAH I'M first!
That's a mighty OLD photo of Carrie you got there.

meleah rebeccah said...

These are hysterical.

I will TRY to think of one for Dane Cook....(the one you left blank)

The Comedian Dane really lives up to his last name Cook with all that chopping.

Thats the best I could do. I know I am lame.

xoxoxox

PS: I heart Reese Witherspoon

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Lauren!

I give 1000 brownie points for the first cvomment, and a free token to stay at the Cat House :-)

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Hi Meleah!

CHOP!!! .... and I love Reese Wither Spoons too. She so cute :-)

Olga, the Traveling Bra said...

You've been a busy beavercat today! :)

Hey...do you know where that glass blowing pitcha is from? I think I know that guy!

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Olga ....... DO TELL!

The picha is from ((stolen))
he heee

Olga, the Traveling Bra said...

Where from? It looks a LOT like it was taken in Orient & Flume Art Glass in Chico, Kalifornia!

Speedcat Hollydale said...

No way!!!!

really ????

Speedcat Hollydale said...

But it was taken in "Hollydale"

Olga, the Traveling Bra said...

WAY! Is it?

Olga, the Traveling Bra said...

Oh yeah...I "forgot"

Silly me!

Speedcat Hollydale said...

You have any cats for the Hollydale pet Hotel??

Olga, the Traveling Bra said...

YES! TWO! I'll email 'em to ya!

Speedcat Hollydale said...

So, a double room with pull out litter, and one de-furballing ....

Speedcat Hollydale said...

How come your hat is not wiggallie

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

When I was the Old Town Cat House a place for critters wasn't what I was thinking. I was thinking more like a brothel. Just saying. Bwahahahahaha.

Have a terrific evening. Big hug. :)

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Well, it was before I took over Sandee. As Sheriff here, it killed to birds with one stone.

Love cats ..... HATE CRIME!!

Michelle Gartner said...

Canadian Bacon is lame and disgusting...

Michelle Gartner said...

I heard Carrie Fisher says she wishes she never did Star Wars... I am thinking "WHAT are you STUPID!!!"

It must be strange to be old and senile, poor Carrie Fisher.

I Ponder said...

You have quite the neighbourhood dere eh, I imagine the New Years Eve party is a blast :D

Olga, the Traveling Bra said...

My hat IS wiggling....just not here. (I'm giving it a rest)

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Michelle!

No Bacons?? ... hmmmm
Carrie wishis her fishing pole was magic too. She hates Star Wars because the Wookie was stinki and Hans Solo dumped her :-)

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Olga ... I can understand

Speedcat Hollydale said...

I Ponder!!

I do a New Years post every year too. Last time was a "Best Of" places to go.

he hee

Drowsey Monkey said...

ahahaha ... Billy Ray Crystal, LOL.

And Carrie Fisher's had so much plastic surgery she's unrecognizable now.

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Yes ... but I still love the woman!

(not)

I am just glad I rounded up the herd of cats. One is still on the loose, but was reported to be running down hi-way 101

Olga, the Traveling Bra said...

I caught that renegade cat Speedy! Cupped him with my right hook....or hooked him with my right cup...???? Here...TAKE HIM!!!

Speedcat Hollydale said...

SWEET ... now I can go back to blogging before Herminskins gets here!!!

Mimi Lenox said...

You sure live in an interesting town.....

Speedcat Hollydale said...

OOOOO nice hat Mimi!

We almost have as much excitment as Bloggingham, not quite. I am just glad my golf cart has a new motor. I put a 454 Chevy big block in it :-)


>>>>>>> ZOOM >>>>>>>>>>> O-O

Discovery Sound said...

Hi Hollydale,

Thanks for the comment. I am going to try to post more. In regards to this post all I can say is I am an average reader recently and when I am feeling stressed with music work I check your blog and get a great laugh or two every time. I swear you should be a page rank 5 or higher.

Crazed Mom said...

Meow, meow, meow. Meow. MEOW!!!!

Daisy said...

Speedy, I'm so glad to see your random hilarious humor still reigns supreme here. Oh golly! What a laugh! Only two dogs? HA HA HA!
Love the dancing cats at the end! :D

Glad to hear the Sheriff is back in town to restore law and order.

Michelle said...

I'm going to say "I am the Princess" next time I go Crappie fishing! Maybe it will bring me luck!!!!

The Muse said...

I find myself drawn to the Trex chasing the chicken! LOL
Ah well, the flip side of a muse...LOL

*Akilah Sakai* said...

LOL!!

You are fan-freakin'-tastic Speedy.

They must erect a statue in your honor in Hollydale, lest they want me to raise hell over there!

Shinade said...

Totally unrelated to this post or any that you have ever made.

Oh my I am such a bad girl! I dared speak out against!

And Oh my Gawd I added my music back.

I am sure that the Entrecard police are going to knock on my door at any moment.

But I posted I feel I feel anyway! Screw em'! Oh yes my music is back and it is auto play.

What can I say the Cherokee cam out in me!

Love you Speedy!!

http://shinade.blogspot.com/2008/12/this-is-not-easy.html

Some times I am so so naughty!!:-)

Shinade said...

Why are we all so afraid? It's just a forum!!

Merry Christmas my love!:-)

wendster said...

that guy in the middle is Todd Sweeney.

The new barber in town.

(kittens all high tail it out of there!)

Julie said...

I giggle just looking at Dane Cook!